So, for the past few weeks, I’ve been trying to commit to “mental health mornings” to start my day. Aside from waking up at the ass-crack of dawn to work out, I’ve been trying my best to take advantage of these early morning rises to “check in” with myself too. So after our work-out, and my boyfriend showers and heads off the work, I sit … Continue reading “the music thing”
I haven’t been very good about writing lately. (I sound like a broken record.) Aside from some journaling here and there and starting a few song ideas, I’ve allowed my mind to be distracted by other things… travelling, packing/unpacking, being outside as much as humanly possible, Harry Potter books (I’ve decided to read the entire series for the first time), putting the finishing touches on … Continue reading the hometown bubble.
It’s a weird thing. I have literally thought to myself and/or said out loud to others, “I really feel like blogging” and yet… nothing. For quite awhile now. That is always a huge indicator for me. I write when I have something that needs to be said. When the desire to write my heart, read it back, and allow myself to process is more overwhelming … Continue reading everything in the middle of nowhere.
http://www.RachelWilliamsOnline.com I don’t know when it happened exactly. I just know it happened. It wasn’t overnight. It wasn’t one catastrophic event. It wasn’t someone’s words that lingered. It wasn’t one specific loss that did me in. So I guess it was an endless series of things…life…that didn’t seem all that noticeable at the time but “out of nowhere”, somehow, it all culminated into a big ball of everything. Defeat. … Continue reading Burden or light.
Yards. Lawns. People take such pride in them, right? Mowing, watering, landscaping, gardening. Personally, I never got into it. However, I do remember how I enjoyed using my push lawn mower in my first rental house. **See photo below for proof** I was about 21 years old, renting a one bedroom, 500 square foot house on a dead end street in East Nashville. Mowing my lawn was my way of … Continue reading What is mine…
It’s 2AM and I can’t sleep. There is nothing particularly wrong. Sometimes the brain just wants to create…and in my case, that means I’m writing. It’s been over a month since my last blog. I’ve thought about sitting down and writing every single day since then. I’d take my laptop in the car with me wherever I’d go…including a couple trips to Nashville in December and … Continue reading “I talked myself out of it.”
I will never, in my lifetime, forget December 2, 2010. I was sleeping in bed alongside my “work-in-progress” boyfriend at the time, in my blue bedroom, in my new house in Hermitage, TN. I woke up to my phone vibrating on the nightstand. I picked it up and immediately saw a photo of a baby in an incubator, all 19 inches and 7 lbs 4 oz of him. The … Continue reading Silenced.
Around this time last year, I was asked out on date by a dude on Tinder, who’s caption read, “It’s getting cold outside. Looking for a girlfriend for the winter.” True story. A girl with my dating track record really had nothing to lose. I had JUST relocated to Michigan for a few months to work on a music project. I had no social life … Continue reading The ultimate “swipe right”
I don’t want to get political. I really don’t. And I won’t. I will say, however, that I urged my fellow family members and friends to vote. I posted on my social media accounts to please, for the love of God, go vote. I spent a good chunk of time sorting through my feelings with my fingers on a keyboard the day before the election. I then … Continue reading Sobering up to a “fallen sky”…
Mortality is something I’ve thought about a lot this year. And when I wasn’t thinking about it, well…it’d come back and slap me in the face a few times to remind me it was still a thing that needed to be thought on. This year taught me a lot about shutting up. Listening. Learning. I absorbed everything… the softness of baby cheeks, the rush I’d get when … Continue reading Death…and what’s left behind.